potted

I am knackered.

For the past 3 or 4 days, I've been weeding, mulching, pruning, potting and re-potting.

The front garden is almost done (more mulch arriving today) and out the back (in pots, with no room for a herb garden) I have

tomatoes
dill
garlic chives
parsley
4 kinds of basil
mint
oregano
sage
2 pots of chillies (which I don't even eat!)


Here is my recipe for a deliciously refreshing drink made with basil and vodka:

muddle
a couple of sprigs of basil
a tspn of sugar
a lime wedge

in the bottom of your glass.

add ice

add vodka

add soda water

enjoy!

This is really best with home-grown basil. And a comfy deck chair.

TEQUILA!

WARNING

do not blog while fridnking tequila.

Dont attemp tot Facebook weither.

That is all.

rental blues

This is a ranty feeling-sorry-for-myself post. Just so you know. I won't think any worse of you for clicking away now.

We live in a rented house. We pay quite a lot of money to live here, partly because it's a 5 bedroom house, and partly because if you stand in the driveway, you have a glimpse of ocean. So that's really nice.

What isn't nice is the maintenance on the house. Which is non-existent.

Our guttering has sprouted grass and is rusting through in places, because the gutters haven't been cleaned in at least 2 years, and we aren't allowed to do them.

The light-fittings are breaking, and because they're early 90s, I can't get replacement parts for them.

The huge hedge at the side of the house needs to be cut down, but we're only allowed to trim it. So that's an on-going battle, as is the grass growing into the unedged garden beds.

When we moved in, there were no net curtains at most of the windows, and the drapes are in poor condition. I can't replace them permanently, so I'm putting up El Cheapo nets and taking them down when we go.

The shed won't lock, and it floods in moderate rain. We can't keep anything in there, even though it takes up half the back yard.

The gates need replacing, the front of the house needs re-painting, the tattered awnings need to be replaced, the paving needs lifting and re-laying, and the interior needs painting as well.

In general, this poor old house, which I actually love, needs care and attention.

I've been hoping to win Lotto, so I can buy it, but my plan falls in a hole every week when I forget to buy a ticket.

I want to paint and re-fit lights and take up the hideous carpet, and make it feel loved.
But I'm not spending lots of money on a house that isn't mine, so all I can do is small things here and there, while the house falls apart around me.

foot in mouth

Have you ever said something stupid?

Something that, even as the words were coming out of your mouth, had you scrabbling in the air to try to drag them back in?

I suffer very badly from foot-in-mouth. You would be horrified by some of the stupid, insensitive things I've said and done in the last 45 years or so.
In fact, if that was all you knew of me, you might not want anything to do with me.

Have a little quick think over some of the dumb things you've said. It's OK, you don't have to tell me (I REALLY don't want to know!)

Now, imagine that after you've said that stupid thing, an acquaintance begins to tell everyone what you said. She gathers a group of people together who call for you to be sacked from your job, and begin a campaign to force your boss to sack you.

Someone tells you they wish you had arse-cancer. Someone else rails on your husband and wants to know why he didn't stop you from saying that thing. Now the group lobbies for your husbands' boss to sack HIM for not shutting you up, or divorcing you for your comment.

Your name and face appear in the local paper, and your children are humiliated at school.

You apologise, but your apology is lost in the clamour and the person you've apologised to refuses to calm the matter down or even publicly accept the apology.

Imagine if all that happened to you. And all you'd done was say something stupid, you hadn't even broken a law.

***

I long for the day when the media in this country grows up. All this shrill, confected outrage over apologies and fake offence is bullshit. I'm sick to death of people being forced to apologise and then their apologies being sneered at.
I'm sick of the lies, the hypocrisy, and the drama.

There are real issues affecting ordinary people in this country right now. Can't we hear about them, instead?

Facebook. Friend or foe?

Facebook warnings, man. I'm so over them.

How many times have you see this on your Facebook page?

WARNNG!! DO NOT ACCEPT FRIEND REQUEST FROM THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE,THEY ARE
SATANISTS/PEDOPHILES/HACKER/INSERT LABEL OF CHOICE blah blah blah.

or this:

I cannot believe that you can see who is viewing your profile. ! I just saw my top 10 profile stalkers and I am SHOCKED that my Ex is still viewing my profile :O ! You can also see WHO VIEWED YOUR PROFILE here [Link Removed]! Its Super Cool

or this:

request to all FB friends - I want to stay PRIVATELY connected with you. However, with the recent changes in FB, the public can now see activities in any wall. This happens when our friend hits "like" or "comment", automatically, their friends would see our posts too. Unfortunately, we cannot change this sett
ing by ourselves because Facebook has configured it this way. So I need your help. Only
you can do this for me.

PLEASE place your mouse over my name above (do not click), a window will appear, now move the mouse on “FRIENDS" (also without clicking), then down to "Settings", click here and a list will appear.

REMOVE the CHECK on "COMMENTS & LIKE" by clicking on it. By doing this, my activity amongst my friends and my family will no longer become public. Paste this on your wall so your contacts would follow suit too, that is, if you care about your privacy.

***

I see these and other warnings at least weekly. Many of my friends and rellies don't really know how Facebook works (do any of us?), and they mean well by sharing such messages.
I've re-posted stuff like that in the past, too -- now I've become very cynical and check everything through snopes.com or Facecrooks
and I do it for several reasons -- firstly, some of these warnings are in fact dangerous.
You can pick up viruses or worms from clicking on these things, and suddenly your computer is affected.

Secondly, a lot of these hoaxes come with so-called 'fixes' attached. But the problem is that the fixes often don't work.
That last message I posted above? about 'hover your mouse over my name etc etc'? that doesn't make your wall private.

If you want to make your information private, you need to go into your privacy settings and manually set everything yourself. Try using a good guide, and make sure that you have everything locked down as securely as you can.
And encourage your friends to do the same.

Having said all that, you should know that sometimes the warnings are real. Yesterday, I saw a post from someone I trust to give me good information (let's call her J), warning that old private messages can be seen on your public Timeline.
I checked a number of sources, all of whom insisted that those were in fact not private messages, but that people had gotten confused between private messages and old wall posts.
I checked my Timeline. Nothing untoward showed up.
But I trust J to know the difference, so I've been checking sources, and some are now saying that they're pushing the matter further because they don't accept the Facebook explanation.
So the lesson is, BE CAREFUL! and when you think you've done everything you can, be EVEN MORE CAREFUL!

Remember that everything you post on Facebook is ON THE INTERNET. It is potentially open to theft or hacking or privacy violations, because it's the INTERNET. There are a lot of bad people out there, and they have the same access to Facebook that you do.

spring has sprung

There ARE a couple of things I like about winter.

Food, mostly.

And curling up by the fire with a good book.

That's pretty much it.

Because in winter, I shut down. I don't go anywhere, or do anything. I lose enthusiasm for just about everything. I feel weighed down.
Taking the kids to school is an effort. Going shopping is an effort. I don't go out for coffee, or go window shopping, or visit the library, or go to the beach.

I stagnate.

And while I don't LIKE it, I feel powerless to do anything about it. Winter (in my head, at least) is the time to hunker down somewhere warm, and wait for it to be over.

But spring has sprung here in BeachTown.

And, OH, I feel good! The flowers are blooming, the birds are out singing (no, it's not the iPad) and the sun is warm.

Whatever is inside me (call it spirit, if you like) is relaxing. I can feel all the tension draining away, those metaphorical shoulders are dropping, losing the defensive hunch against the cold and grey.
I can breathe big lungfuls of warm, scented air, I can leave my bedroom windows open all night, I can bask and revel and delight in the sun.

I know there's rain ahead -- we get our rain through winter and spring -- but the winter has passed for another year......
.......and I'm LOVIN it!

book club

I heart Facebook, I really do.

It keeps me in touch with family, lets me stalk friends, and allows me to post a million political and football related articles and photos.

Recently I joined a support group for local women whose husbands do FIFO, or DIDO (which, for those of you not in the mining game, means Fly In Fly Out, or Drive In Drive Out)
As an off-shoot of that group, I also joined my first ever bookclub. We met today for a meet-and-greet, and to collect our first book.

All of the ladies involved in the group have husbands who work away. One is married to a man who works on boats, the rest are mining shift-workers.

We 'get' each other. We know how hard it is to be a single mum most of the time, and a wife for a little while.

I think a couple of the ladies know each other already, but most of us are strangers. One of the group moved over here from New Zealand just a couple of months ago, and I hope that she makes friends because it must be horribly lonely for her.

It always make me feel good when I meet a strange bunch of women, and we find ways to connect rather than disagree. I spend a lot of time on-line, and .... well, you know ... the on-line community can be amazing but it can also be really divisive.

I tend to stay at home a lot (and then whinge that life is boring) so it's really good for me to get out of the house and meet people I might not bump into otherwise.

I had thought I might be the oldest one there -- and I am, I think, but only JUST! this is a good thing. There's a nice mix of ages and I'm looking forward to the first 'real' book club meeting.

And the book? is this:

The Hundred Year Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared.

the notebook(s)

A few months ago, I bought 2 cheap spiral-bound notebooks (yes, yes, I know, baby trees were clubbed to death in China to make those notebooks. Don't care)

One is lurid pink, the other dead black. For the Princess and Mr 10.

What we do with them is this:

every couple of days, I'll write a letter to the child, and hide the notebook under their pillow.
When they get into bed at night, they find the notebook, and you wouldn't believe the delight on their faces!
(I know, because I sometimes hide nearby and watch)
Then they sneak out of bed, scribble busily in the book, and creep to my room to hide the notebook under my pillow. They are not very good at creeping. Mostly they hover at the edge of my line of sight from the lounge, then they'll make a sudden dash for my door when they think I'm distracted.

It's all great fun!

Sometimes Daddy writes in the book, too, and then they don't know whose pillow to hide the book under.

There's no great literature going on here. I tell them how proud I am of something they achieved that day, or how nice it was to have them around, or some small thing. They thank me, or just tell me they love me. Mr 10s replies can be quite --- shall we say, to the point? "thanks" or "same"..... but they're precious, anyway.

There's lots of good reasons to do this -- the kids have visual proof that I was thinking about them in the day (not that they really think I wouldn't); it gives them reading and writing practice; it involves them in some secret, family memory...

... but mostly, it's about me.

I want my kids to look back on their childhood, "Mum was kinda weird, but she sure was a lot of fun!"

say WHAT???

I am not meant to be thinking about my 50th birthday party.

In my head, I'm somewhere between 32 and 35. I know people who wish they were back in their 20s, but that's not me at all. I had my head up my arse in my 20s, I was a miserable stoner and had no appreciation of my life or the people in it.

But my 30s were pretty cool. My 40s haven't been bad, mind -- it's just that they're bringing me ever closer to

50.

FIFTY, people. Freakin FIFTY.

How do you get your head round that?

Look, if you're 50 plus, and fine with it, good on ya. I'm so so happy for you, here's a balloon, go away.
Because it is freaking me the fuck out.

It isn't even that actual age that's doing me in -- it's just the constant reminder of my mortality.
And not just mine, but my husbands' too.

In the last few months -- well, since April -- I've had 3 friends diagnosed with breast cancer, several who've lost parents, and two who've had possible hideous disfiguring cancers.

I keep being reminded -- I could DIE. Like, really, DIE. And be GONE. FOREVER.

How could the world keep going without me in it?

I know. I know. Totally narcissistic. But, really? how could it?