Monday, October 11, 2010

I think I'm petrophobic....

I hate putting petrol in my car.

No, seriously, when I have to fill the car, I feel sick and my hands shake. I hate it so much that I avoid it as long as possible, and trust me, this is not a fear that you should cope with by Avoidance Technique... you know?

It's too weird. I'm not a Useless Female.

I have had 7 babies WITHOUT DRUGS. And two of them were 10 pounders.

I am the woman who has packed up and moved uncomplainingly without fear well, moved anyway, time and time again, following Fabios' mining career to some of the most Godforsaken spots in the country.
I am encouraging him to work overseas for 4 weeks at a time (and no, not because I'm happier that way)

I've buried a child, for crying out loud (he was already dead. Just sayin')

And I'm so terrified of filling the car with petrol that I'll risk running out just so I don't have to do it 'this trip'.
It's stupid. It doesn't work for me, in DrPhilSpeak. I know that.

So why do I do this?
I think it's the unfamiliarity. Petrol stations are Mens' Domains. Or something.
I worry that there'll be a line-up, that I won't know where to park, that I'll do something wrong and look stupid, that the pump won't work properly, etc etc -- this long list of stupid irrational fears that make me look like a dumb-ass.
Oddly enough, the fear diminishes once I'm familiar with the station.
Today I found a nice place, less than 3 kms from my door. I don't care if it's more expensive than the Woollies servo in town -- the man was nice (he escaped from the desert too) and he has ostrich eggs for sale! I still had to pump my own fuel but it wasn't anywhere near as traumatic as I had imagined....

AND the warning light in my car is now gone. WHEW! Maybe next time I won't wait till it comes on.....

PS it appears I'm not the only one. RELIEF! I wouldn't want to be, you know, strange.

4 comments:

  1. Toni... i still say BRING BACK DRIVE-WAY SERVICE!!!!!!!

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  2. We all have irrational fears that just come out of nowhere. Petrol filling is a new and slightly bizarre one, I'll give you that, but no less weird than some of the little fears I've developed here and there over the years. It must be daunting to feel that little clutch of fear every time that darn fuel warning lamp comes on!! I'm glad you've found a 'safe' outlet. x

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  3. Your son is 15+, technically he can do the pumping for you :D

    Glad you found somewhere you feel comfortable. After our little walk this morning and the caravan invasion I can see where some of that fear emerges from.

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  4. Toni, you can do it!!! I used to be like this..now it's okay as long as I don't put unleaded in the diesel tank.....hey I just linked back to you, on my blog...sorry better late than never re the award xxxxxx

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