meet my daughter, the tramp

I came across this article last week, and BOY did it tick some boxes for me!

Living by the beach, we're used to seeing half-naked girls wandering the streets, but sometimes, you have to wonder, 'What parent would ever let their child out of the house looking the way she does?'

We have daughters.
My oldest daughter dresses modestly.
Our youngest is 6, and eyes off the mini-skirts and tarty knickers and crop-tops and skinny jeans and leopard-prints, but she isn't in control of the purse-strings.
I am.

And I'm a mean mummy (you just ask her, she'll tell you.)

I don't understand why any parent will buy tarty clothes for a small child, or let their teenage daughters go out looking like street-walkers.
What kind of message are we sending our girls?
You're not worth anything, so we don't care how you look?
Don't have any respect for yourself?
Look like a tart, so all the boys are looking at your body and not caring about your character?

The article I've linked to ends with these words... (emphasis mine)

In 2007, the American Psychological Association's Taskforce On The Sexualization Of Girls  issued a report linking early sexualization with three of the most common mental-health problems of girls and women: eating disorders, low self-esteem and depression. There's nothing inherently wrong with parents wanting to appease their daughters by buying them the latest fashions. But is getting cool points today worth the harm dressing little girls like prostitutes could cause tomorrow?
A line needs to be drawn, but not by Abercrombie. Not by Britney Spears. And not by these little girls who don't know better and desperately need their parents to be parents and not 40-year-old BFFs.


What do YOU think? if you have daughters, are you concerned by the fashions we see in our shops? or do you think they should be free to wear what they like?

I'm a Diana tragic.

With the wedding coming up, I've been YouTubing Diana. And crying.

Looking at wedding pictures, and crying.

Do you remember this?

I was 15. I thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world.

Just a few years later, she looked like this.

She loved her boys so much

And they loved her.
Listen to Harry here.

So what is it about this woman that so touched our hearts? Because she really was the Peoples' Princess.

And it's so unutterably sad that she won't be watching her son marry this week.

how can I help you?

I love living in a town that relies so heavily on tourism. (mostly) (except for the crowds)

I'm one of those annoying people who thinks that if you're paying for service, you should get good service.

When I worked in shops, I was taught that THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. That THE CUSTOMER LEAVES HAPPY.

Seems kind of old-fashioned now, in a world where 14 year olds think they're not being paid enough to wipe tables at Maccas.

And have you asked for help in your average K-Mart or Target lately? Service in K-Mart is so bad that I've stopped going there altogether, and Target is a last resort. I'd rather go without, or pay a little more and go into one of the small, locally-owned shops where they rely more heavily on customer satisfaction.
Or shop ON-LINE (hear me, Gerry Harvey?)

But at least if you live where tourism is a major factor in the local economy, service isn't entirely a foreign concept.

We used to go to Rainy Beach Town quite a lot. Rainy Beach Town is tucked quite out of the way, in WA. And service there is pretty hit-and-miss. Everything, except for the supermarkets, closes by midday on a Saturday - and when I say 'by' I mean sometimes 11:30 sees the doors slam shut. So we learned to shop fast.

The best part though, was the 'hospitality' industry.

The first place we stayed at, I left my gold bangles behind somehow. I rang the resort as soon as I got home, and the woman said, "Oh yes, one of the cleaners found them. Just a minute, I'll go look for them."

Long silence.

She came back and told me she could only find one, which was odd because she had put them in a safe place.
Resort safe? desk drawer? filing cabinet?

No. She had dropped them over the pens in her pen-pot, on her desk.

Yup.

She went away and looked some more, and finally located the missing bangle, which had been 'moved by the cleaning staff'. One bangle. Moved from the pen-pot, leaving one behind.

"Right," I said. "Well, since we live 200 kms away, do you think that you could put them into an envelope and send them back to me, next time you're in the Post Office? I'm happy to pay postage and a little extra for your trouble."

"Oh, no." she said. "No. It's too much bother."

Pardon????

Eventually, I arranged for someone's friends' mother-in-law to go in and pick them up, give them to friend, who gave them to someone, who returned them to me.

And we never stayed there again.

And yes, everyone I knew heard that story.

The next place we tried, my husband was groped by a naked man and the woman who ran the place 'adopted' us and came to visit every day while celebrating something (there was always something to celebrate, it seems) and stayed till she ran out of whatever-she-was-drinking.

After that, we found some utterly gorgeous townhouses that we loved, though they were horribly expensive, and we had to book weeks ahead.
But the service was good!

an ANZAC legend

In August 1940, a young man named George Roland Smith enlisted in the army.

On the 10th April 1941 he was sent overseas, and served in Siam, Malaya, Singapore and Java, as a driver.

In March of 1942, Java fell to the Japanese forces, and George (Nibsy) was reported missing, believed to be a POW.

Until his POW status was confirmed, his family back home in North Queensland had no way of knowing if he was alive or dead.

The years between his capture and his eventual return to Australia are a bit of a mystery.

Nibsy never spoke much of his capture, or of life as a POW. We know he was in Changi, but he also said once that there were worse places than Changi, and we know he was moved around quite a bit.

From reading other accounts of life as a Japanese POW, we know he was starved, dehydrated, humiliated and saw many of his mates die a horrible and painful death from disease and torture. He slept in the mud, ate rotten food (when he could get it) and worked like a slave for his captors. He was about as mis-treated as a man could ever be.

I read a book called One Fourteenth of an Elephant, by Ian Denys Peek, that gives a pretty good description of what men like Nibsy went through. It's not for the faint-hearted.

One of the things that struck me most in reading this book was that many of the POWs were concerned how they'd be viewed by their fellow soldiers. They worried that they'd 'helped' the enemy, by being forced to build roads, and railways. They worried that they'd been out of the fight, while other men were still at war. It broke my heart to read it.

Today, I want to pay tribute to soldiers like George Roland Smith. They are the true heroes of this country.
May we never forget.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years contemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them.

chocolate cult

Some of you know that I used to go to a fundamentalist church (some might say -- indeed, HAVE said -- cult) and that I left for various reasons which have nothing to do with this post.
But it's background info I guess.

Because one of the things I picked up from my years in chains church was a deep and abiding reverence for Easter and Christmas.

To me, they are Holy Days, and so we celebrate them a little differently to most people.
The emphasis since we left church is on people and celebrating rather than gifts and chocolate. We don't have Santa or the Easter Bunny, for example, and though we give presents for Christmas (and plenty of them) we also tell the Christmas Story and have the nativity scene front and centre.

Easter for us is a big deal. We have a candlelit roast lamb dinner on Good Friday, which we celebrate as a modified Passover, and we talk about the children of Israel escaping Egypt and slavery under Pharoah.
We have a Seder plate, piled high with
* hard-boiled eggs (symbolising suffering and new life)
* the roasted lamb shank bone (symbolising the blood sacrifice)
* bitter herbs (horseradish) symbolising the bitterness of slavery
* parsley (symbolising Spring and bringing hope)
* salt water (symbolising the tears cried in slavery)
* haroset (little bricks made of nuts, honey, apple and wine) (symbolising the work of slavery)
* unleavened bread (symbolising how quickly the children of Israel had to leave Egypt)

The kids love dipping into the Seder plate, and trying to remember what each item represents. We bring the crucifixion into it, too, but nothing like as full on as we used to.

We drink lots of wine (Maison for the kids) and we used to have people over too, which made it more fun, but Fabio isn't into dinner guests for some reason so now it's just us.

I make a chocolate tart for dessert, which is so thick and sticky the kids call it Tar Pudding, and then we stagger off and collapse for a few hours.

Sunday is very low-key. We put the eggs by the kids' beds before they wake, and if we remember we have an egg hunt at some point during the day, but it's no big deal.

I miss the days when we had too many people to fit round the table, and ended up using Vegemite jars because we ran out of good glasses, you know? It was so fun, lots of laughter and plenty of help with the dishes too!

But that's part of marriage, isn't it? Things change.

on the road again.....

I'm writing today with tears in my eyes, so please excuse any spelling mistakes cos I can't actually see very well.

The house we moved into down here, our beautiful home that we love so much, has been put on the market. We can't afford to buy it, and at this price, I doubt it will go to an investor because they can't charge enough in rent to cover the repayments.

So I'll be moving again.

And even typing that makes my heart ache and my throat throb with unshed tears so that's all I'm saying for today.

game for anything

I admit it, the ChickChat House is gamer-geeky. All of us but Fabio, who just won't play anything.

We have a Wii, a PS3, an X-Box 360, a PS2, and hundreds of games. We play games on computers, too.

I own a Lara Croft figure and I bought Assassins' Creed as a pre-order because it came in a funky box that looks like a medieval stone casket.

And I have the Wii-Fit board and game. Which I use as a weight-loss tool.

No, no, seriously.

If you haven't seen the Wii-Fit before, it really is good IF you use it. The game (Wii-Fit Plus) takes your weight (ouch!) and lets you set a goal for weight-loss (say, 2 kgs within a month) Then it tracks your progress. And it has a kind of calorie burner too, which tells you how much each exercise will burn and also what the equivalent is in food.

The games themselves are fun.

There are 4 divisions -- you can choose from yoga, balance games, muscle workouts, or cardio, which includes jogging,

step aerobics, and hula-hooping.
THIS is how I sold Fabio on the idea of investing so much money in a game console....
Of course, I don't look like that, but he still enjoys watching :)

The board also measures your stance. I found I was standing way too far back on my heels, which was one of the reasons why my feet were so sore at the end of the day. I'm training myself to stand properly now.

I know there's been a lot of back-and-forth about whether Wii-Fit will really help you lose weight or not, but I reckon it's like any other exercise machine. If it sits in the corner gathering dust, it's a waste of money, but if it gets you up and moving, then it can only be a good thing.

So what about you? do you play games? own consoles? have you tried the Wii-Fit?

deep fried fruit chat

I thought I might do posts on some of my favourite blogs, from time to time.

Then I thought, heck, I'll get some guests on and then they can do all the hard work writing a post, and I can drink more gin. Win-win (for me, anyway)

So my very first special guest star blogger is......

Leanne, from Deep Fried Fruit.

I'm very excited about this. Partly because I hear the gin calling my name, but also because Leannes' is one of the blogs I read EVERY day. She's a hugely inspirational person, who almost always looks on the bright side of life. She's funny and real, so without further ado, let's cross (live!) (almost) to Leanne.....

How exciting!! My first guest post. I feel like a celebrity getting interviewed for OK Magazine …

1. tell us a little about yourself
Apparently (according to my blog banner) I’m fit, fabulous and slightly fatigued. I got the fatigue bit right.

I am busy all the time. Until I’m not, which is when I crash and fall into a deep pit … which happens from time to time.

a. what do you do in your 'real life'?
Well, I wear lots of hats: I’m a wife, and a mother, and a daughter. I’m a cheer coach, and a Success Consultant and a relief member of the school’s Learning Support Unit. I’m a children’s book author and a blogger and friend.

b. what's your life philosophy?
My life philosophy is all about belief. Believe and you will achieve. And secondly it’s all about perception. We experience the world not as it is, but as we are. And thirdly, it’s all about action. You’ve got to get out there and do the thing if you want the thing to get done.

2. tell us about your blog (s)
Deep Fried Fruit is The Diary of a Fit, Fabulous and Slightly Fatigued 40 (ish) Year Old. I have other blogs, but DFF is the only one I’ve made public.

 a. what made you decide to start blogging?
Why did I start DFF? I blame the movie Julie and Julia. I watched it a couple of days after my 40th birthday. I thought, what a great way to get rid of some of internal dialogue! What a great way to fulfil my dream of becoming a writer. I came home and started blogging immediately with a goal to blog every day in my 40th year. It was to be part of my continual year of celebration as I entered the official mid-life zone. But when I hit 41 I couldn’t let it go. I was supposed to stop at Day 365 but here I am having just celebrated Day 555. I still blog every single day. Every single freakin’ day …

b. what's your biggest challenge as a blogger?
Blogging every single freakin’ day … that’s definitely a challenge. Finding the time, the energy and the subject matter to blog daily. But I’m a chatterbox, so I normally manage to pull something out of my head to put on the blogosphere (whether people want to read it or not …)

c. what makes your blog unique?
Is it unique? I don’t know. Maybe. Perhaps the fact that I write every day and that it truly is a diary. There are times I join blog links and partake in organised subject matters, but the primary purpose of my blog is to be a diary. A diary of real life issues, random thoughts, emotions, middle aged phenomena’s and the occasional need to vent.

d. what advice would you give to new bloggers?
 I’m no bloggy expert, so I’m not sure my advice is worth much, but I blog because I enjoy it. I think that’s the key. Make sure it is fun for you - that you are writing the way you want to write, when you want to write it, and about the things that interest you. Within that process you will attract like-minded people and in time establish a great support network.

3. if you had to choose a song or movie title to describe your life, what would it be?
Toy Story comes to mind, as does Bring It On, Mama Mia and National Lampoon’s Summer Vacation (we are the Griswalds).

I don’t know! I honestly don’t know. I mean, my family life and marriage is very close to the Dunphy’s in “Modern Family”, and my relationship with Mum (and my humour) is very “Kath and Kim”. But one movie or song? Hmmmm.

Oh, oh, oh …. I know … I’ve got a song that sums up my life …

“We’re all in this together” by Ben Lee. Yep, that’s my song.

“Woke up this morning
I suddenly realized
We're all in this together
I started smiling
Cos you were smiling
And were all in this together
I'm made of atoms
You're made of atoms
And were all in this together
And long division
Just doesn't matter
Cos were all in this together”

4. do you ever play Solitaire on your computer?
 I actually don’t! I used to have a Palm Pilot and would play solitaire whenever I was waiting about for kids at school or dancing or whatever, but no, I don’t play games on my computer. If I have spare time on the computer it is used for blogging or stalking fellow bloggers …

5. if you had a superpower, what would it be?
Oh yay! Love this question. (Vigorous little hand clap accompanied with squeal).
If I had a superpower it would be to switch people’s mindsets with the click of a button. I know, I know, that sounds completely nerdy and un-fun, and it would put me out of business, but that is what I would choose.
I just want everyone to experience joy in their life and see the good and the gratefuls in their everyday.

Can I have two super powers? Cause I’d also wanna be able to fly. Gotta be a flying superhero …

*****

How about a round of applause for the lovely Leanne? Or, even better, leave her some comment love either here or over at her place. It won't take long and it'll make her day!

anybody need some mulch?

Clean up continues in the Cassowary Coast region of North Queensland, where Yasi did so much damage in February.

There have been 59,528 truck movements (as of Friday April 8) for all waste removal since Cyclone Yasi.
More than 600,000 cubic metres of waste has been removed.
The bulk of that is green waste (483,000 cubic metres).

This green waste has been processed into 193,300 cubic metres of mulch – enough to fill a football field more than 32m high. It's free to residents.

The sheer number of trucks on the roads, combined with massive rainfall (at least 3 metres of rain so far this year) means the roads are in terrible condition. One 20 km stretch requires major works in about 18 places.
Council estimates around 30% of roads have significant damage, and many more require some work.
An early estimate of the damage bill for roads is more than $50 million.

The constant rain, pretty much daily since Feb., has made work difficult. There's much that can't be completed (or even begun) until the rain stops. Locals are hopeful at the moment -- they've had sun for the last week.

The Council has supplied 137 fully‐furnished bedrooms (in transportable houses, units and caravans) to those whose homes were destroyed or damaged, and to those workers who are helping with the reconstruction effort. More accomodation is arriving.

Council has also provided laundry, toilet and shower facilities for those who don't have their own homes.

Re-building of private homes has not yet begun. A combination of bad weather and slow insurance payouts means there are still many people out of their own homes.

Asbestos has been removed from council and public property, although property owners are responsible for asbestos clean-up on private property. Some of the older houses destroyed by Yasi were made of asbestos and the removal has had to be carried out very carefully.

Cassowary feeding stations have been set up, water courses have to be cleared of debris, and work on damaged council infrastructure is expected to begin soon.

Cases of dengue fever are being reported, and spraying and trapping have begun. (I love the idea of mosquito traps. I picture them as tiny little rabbit-traps, makes me laugh every time)

The foreshore has been cleaned up, trees have been saved or cleared, sand replenishment carried out, and seawalls are being inspected and repaired.

Council has also ordered in extra wheelie bins, to replace those carried away in the cyclone.

Did you know that clean-up was still going on in the area? I wouldn't have either, except that my sister lives there. She tells me that the rainforest is fighting back, with leaves and even flowers appearing, though it will take years before the region looks as beautiful as it did last Christmas.

Money will help, of course.
If you're planning a holiday in the next year or so, won't you consider visiting the Cassowary Coast? Some of the resorts are back to business-as-usual, and others are working hard to re-open as soon as possible.