HELLO! MY NAME IS INIGO MONTOYA. YOU KILLED MY FATHER! PREPARE TO DIE!
or possibly -- "I want my father back, you son of a bitch!" STAB!
Anyway, in the interests of blogging I'm applying the theory to my day. So far. Because it's only 9:30 am.
I have a festery splinter in the most useful finger I own. NO not the RUDE finger! the pointer one. The one I use to do everything with (except complain. I use the RUDE finger to complain.)
I got the splinter yesterday from firewood, and I can't dig it out, and it hurrrrrrrrts - maybe not like having a baby or ripping a nail clean off, but still.
And the only Band-aid I could find in the doctor bag is a bright pink Barbie Band-aid.
I'll leave it to you to decide which is the worst part of that little scenario. Because it all depends on how you rate the sight of a 45 year old woman wearing Barbie Band-aids. If you can even tell what kind it is. I'm not wearing my glasses so to me, it looks like a hot pink blur.
The best part is that I also found Magnoplasm in the doctor bag AND it wasn't past its' expiry date!
OH NO Toni.... a HOT PINK BARBIE BANDAID!!!!
ReplyDeleteWHAT?????? has the world come to ??? hehehehehe
I love your band aid! What the hell ... it's covering up an ouch that proves you're no smarmy Barbie!
ReplyDeleteAlso, what is Magnoplasm? I assume it's like our Neosporin ... but Magnoplasm sounds infinitely more useful. Like some special healing herb from Star Wars :)
LOL -- it's described as a Drawing Agent -- which sounds kinda cool and mysterious... actually it just draws the 'yuck' out of a wound.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you could start a splinter group. It wooden’t be too difficult…..
ReplyDeleteHope you soon get it out.
All the best, Boonie
I haven't heard of Magnoplasm in years. My mum always had some handy for us kids. Castor oil is also a drawing agent I think.
ReplyDeleteI have Simpsons and Muppet Show bandaids, because they were on special, two-for-one. As long as they do the job, I don't care what they look like.
hahaha Boonie, your puns made me giggle out loud.
ReplyDeleteAlso River -- my doctor wears Simpsons Bandaids, he says they heal quicker :)
Am hoping that the only reason you haven't posted yet today is that you can't bear the sight of the hot pink bandaid on the keyboard - not because the finger has fallen off. I'm often seen sporting a Simpson's bandaid. When it's all you got, it's all you got.
ReplyDeleteLOML had to go into work (or at least into the nearest Chemist) with a Barbie bandaid on his face one morning. Could be worse.
ReplyDeleteNot sure what a magnoplasm is, but I'm imagining that it's like a medical magnum ice cream bar that you get to eat after you give blood... or something.
Put some drawing ointment on that splinter (in the Chemist up the back behind things like oil of cloves and hydro peroxide) x